I’m Such a Hopeless Libtard That It Bothers Me When We Side With the Authoritarian Predator State
Pretty cringe, right?
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I confess: I’m a walking cliché sometimes. I live in a big East Coast city, I subscribe to The New York Times — I was at the Women’s March in 2016 and I might own a pussy hat if I knew how to knit. When Republicans picture an insufferable Acela corridor shitlib, they’re largely picturing me. And I even laugh at myself sometimes: I once carried a latte into a Volvo dealership while wearing a Weezer t-shirt and thought: “I hope Breitbart doesn’t snap a picture of this.”
Because I know that I live in a blue bubble, I take my own perceptions with a grain of salt. So, take the Russia/Ukraine war: It seems to me that Ukraine got invaded by a country that is led by a dictator who has been explicit about his expansionist goals. It also seems that America has a clear moral and strategic interest in Ukraine winning this war. Miraculously, Ukraine has fought Russia to a standstill without the deployment of a single American soldier, and our aid to Ukraine might be the best value for money in the entire budget, because it asserts American power in a way that China, Iran, and North Korea can’t fail to notice. And that’s why I also find it shocking that Trump would fumble away that advantage by siding with Russia in what seems like an obvious contradiction of every possible conception of American interest.
But I probably only feel that way because I’m such an embarrassing libtard! Honestly, just typing that paragraph made me roll my eyes — I sound like I’m auditioning for an MSNBC show called Resistance Roundtable. For Christ’s sake, Nicholas Kristof and Chuck Schumer said basically exactly what I just said; it’s like the Soy Boy Symphony Orchestra is playing “Self-Righteous Umbrage in D”, and I’m angling to be the key soloist. And the more I think about Ukraine, the more I seem like such a cringe-inducing liberal caricature that they’ll probably base a character on me in the next season of White Lotus.